A couple of weeks ago a friend of mine informed me of a shop in the Tied Up With Strings congo on Hyena Cart that was selling a breast milk cream kit. I went on over to the site and read the description. It sounded good. Read the testimonials. They sounded good. So I though of ways I could use this cream in my daily life. Breast milk is commonly used on burn victims. Ryan is always slathering on the Aloe sunburn lotion after he plays baseball so he could use this cream. Ellie is always getting killer rashes so I could use the cream on them. Breast milk is great for dry skin so I could use it on my feet, elbows, and knees. OK I'm sold. So I ordered a kit. I guess it took the lady a long time to package up the oil, butter, wax and secret ingredient because it took over a week for her to ship it to me.
Yesterday I open my mailbox and there was the package. My eyes lit up and I got a big grin on my face. I felt like a kid at Christmas. So I open the package and this is what was inside.
I got out the enclosed sheet and read the instructions. It called for 7 oz. of breast milk so I broke into my freezer stash. It will never get used for anything else since Ellie will not have anything to do with any artificial nipple, LOL.
The instructions say to put all the ingredients into a microwave safe bowl except the pink stuff because adding that can start a fire. A F'ing fire?!?! Yikes! I was extra careful to not let that stuff anywhere near the concoction until it was done.
Next you are supposed to put the mixture into the microwave. This step really disappointed me. You are NEVER supposed to microwave breast milk because it kills the live antibodies that make the milk so special. What is the point of using breast milk in this cream if you are killing all the good stuff? Why not use regular old milk? Oh well, I already started the process so I put the stuff in the microwave. I had to take it out with one minute and seventeen seconds remaining because it was starting to bubble a little and the instruction say "DO NOT LET MIXTURE BOIL". This is what it looked like after it came out of the micro. YUM!!! NOT.
The next step requires you to mix the mixture with your beaters for a few minutes. My kitchen beaters? OK. I guess I can do that.
This is what it looked like after beating. It got bubbly. wow.
After you mix you have to let it sit for a few minutes and then beat it again. After I beat it this time the mixture was thicker. When I was done beating this is what it looked like.
The next set of directions say to put in the secret pink stuff, mix again, then transfer the cream into the provided containers and let them sit, uncovered, for 4 hours. After I filled the 3 containers I had a ton left over. Now in any normal recipe where I would use my mixer I would lick the beaters and scoop up the bowl batter with my finger and eat it. Since this was not one of those recipes I scraped the beaters and the bowl and did what I thought was natural. I put the extra cream in a breast milk storage bag :)
There. Now I can add chemist to my resume.
Although this was a fun project I don't think I will be buying the kit again. I thought the ingredients were unoriginal and the fact that you had to microwave the breast milk almost to a boil completely defeated the purpose of using it.
I used the cream today when I got out of the shower and I would not suggest using it as an all over body cream. It is VERY thick. Unless your skin is damp, it is next to impossible to rub in. I did use it on my feet, knees, and elbows. My hands feel waxy now and I can tell I have lotion on. OH well.........you win some and you lose some.